In Our Maker's Image

Next week, many of us will get together with friends and/or family and celebrate Thanksgiving.

God extends his hospitality and his welcome to each of us. Cultivating a practice of hospitality means that we seek to remember to welcome and be hospitable to each other and to the Lord as He dwells with us, leads us, and commissions us to serve. God cares about our physical and spiritual needs. We by the grace of God, have the challenge and privilege of comforting and nourishing others, of inviting them to our table, saying, “Come. Receive comfort, healing, nourishment, and protection. You are welcome here.”

A friend and respected minister, Velma, embodies a gift of hospitality. The few times I have been privileged to come to her house I have witnessed and learned from her welcoming spirit. Velma’s hospitality takes the form of spiritual companionship, respect for others’ solitude, attention to detail, and genuine concern for individual welfare. She loves to entertain, to cook, to set a beautiful table, and to bring people together.

There are many other forms that hospitality can take. My mother has taught me hospitality in another way. My mom’s approach to hospitality has less to do with making sure that people are physically comfortable than with having a tremendous ability to accept people, love them, and cheer them on. The dozens of piano students who are welcomed into her music studio each week learn about hospitality before they ever learn Bach or Beethoven.

We can practice hospitality by being truly present to others, respecting other’s space, honoring individual differences, or inviting input from those whose voices are not being heard. Sometimes it requires some self-preparation to do this. For example, a friend might call me on the phone and really need to talk about something that happened. I am not doing either of us a favor if I end up pretending to listen because I am really preoccupied with something that happened during my day. Or, I am staying somewhere with a relative or friend that I am excited to have time with. She needs some solitude. Am I able to give her what she needs right then? Maybe my father wants to watch the latest science fiction movie and I would rather watch a mystery. Are there colleagues whose ideas and suggestions are frequently overlooked without consideration? How do I handle these and other situation in a way that affirms the needs and wishes of others without obliterating mine? I have learned that I have to make sure that I have have taken care of whatever I need to or are at least honest about whether I have. This way I can really listen to another’s heart, simply be physically present, or do whatever else is called for.

May you experience God’s hospitality this Thanksgiving and share it with those whom you celebrate with, whether they are in the same location or not.

Being generous gently loosens our grip on the money, things, and people we hold captive with our expectations, clamoring for security, and need to control. As our grip loosens and our heart opens, we find new freedom and new connection. Generosity opens our heart and affirms our connection to the Divine, to community, to humanity, and to all of creation.

Not too long ago, I came across a retelling of the story of the prodigal son by Henri Nouwen. In the book, Nouwen speaks to the story from the perspectives of the prodigal son, the elder son, and the father. Hearing the story anew from the perspective of the father opened my eyes to the significance of generosity and its link to sacrifice. The youngest son asks his father for his inheritance so that he can go into the world and make his fortune. The father responds by giving the son entirely what he asks for. He forsakes his own desires on behalf of his son. When the prodigal son returns after having squandered his inheritance, all he hopes for is that he will be allowed to be a servant in his father’s house. However, he is in for quite a surprise. His father’s generosity pours out in joy and celebration in seeing the son return. The father gives him a rich robe, places a valuable ring on his finger, and prepares a feast. His generosity spills forth to this younger son and to his elder son to whom he says, “All I have is yours.” The father does not reserve anything. He gives willingly, generously, and lovingly. The father not only gives what he has, he gives who he is to his sons. This is the image of a God, who longs to shower us with abundance and blessings. We are true to this image when we give generously.

The feast in the parable of the prodigal son is in some ways similar to a supper that Jesus took Matthew to as recorded in Matthew 9:9-13. Jesus met Matthew who was working as a tax collector. Tax collectors were despised by the people because they carried out financial oppression under the direction of the Roman government and often exploited the people. Yet Jesus took Matthew to a house for dinner and the story says that many other tax collectors and sinners joined them. The Pharisees did not like Jesus fraternizing with this type of crowd. When they asked him why he kept such company He said, “Go and learn what this means, ‘ I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have come to call not the righteous but sinners.” (Matthew 9:13).

In the Gospel story, Jesus referred to His guests as being “sick;” their ailment came in the form of a lost place and meaning within the community. Jesus identified the outcasts of society, like Matthew, and invited them to fellowship with Him. With His actions, Jesus points us to an understanding of God as One who strives to bring all people into His generous embrace. This is the God who will go out and find the single sheep that has been lost from the fold. Jesus points us to God’s generosity and invites us to be open to having our hearts melt, to sacrificing our priorities and pride in favor of God’s generosity, and to extend this generosity to the rest of God’s children.

Shortly after I was born, I met two people who would become my godparents. Aunt Dot rescued me from the perils of a new mother who, with the best intentions, decided that the only way I’d be warm enough was to have my entire body wrapped in so many blankets that steam was practically coming off of me. Dot took me outside of the church and let me cool off. Aunt Dot and Uncle Dan have been some of the most cherished people in my life ever since then. I mention Dot and Dan because they are ordinary people with extraordinary generosity. Dot and Dan opened their home and their hearts to a number of families and especially children who needed a place where they could be loved and cared for. Dot’s Southern roots usually expressed themselves as a welcoming and hospitality that put people at ease and that made sure there was always plenty of food on the table. Dan, too, was committed to social justice and concerned about the real needs of people. Dot taught me how to cook for church family camps, taught me in Sunday school class, and took me to yard sales on Saturdays where we’d comb for treasures between 5 cents and a dollar. Dan would talk with me about history and how we could learn from our roots. He liked to play card games and board games. He helped me learn about finances and investing and in many ways became a second father for me. I had them on the equivalent of speed dial by the time I was two years old. They were good to my parents too, offering advice, encouragement, and free babysitting every once in awhile. They are the kind of people who just breathe generosity, goodness, and humility in offering what they can. I always felt that I was accepted for who I was and that I had a permanent place in their hearts and at their table.

Being generous mirrors God’s generosity towards us perfectly embodied in Jesus. We share Christ’s generosity when we give to those in need. This might be anything from making a contribution to the local food bank, supporting another type of charity, visiting with people in a retirement home, or taking toys to a children’s hospital. We could give our neighbor a ride to the auto shop to pick up his car or help a child raise funds to go to summer camp. Or if we have a particular talent for playing piano or handling money, being generous might mean offering free piano lessons to a child who could not otherwise afford to take them or helping a young adult learn about handling finances. It might also mean that after spending a lot of time at work or busy with other activities we make sure to spend quality time with our spouse or take our son or daughter to a movie. Generosity could also take the form of taking a co-worker who has been somewhat ostracized out to lunch or befriending someone in the community that does not have a lot of other friends. Living generously might require that regardless of how another person treats us, we reign in our natural impulses to escalate the conflict and instead act generously, choosing respect and compassion when we’d rather act with anger or spite. It means that we live with an open heart and open hands, stretching ourselves beyond what we thought we could offer. Friends, family, acquaintances and strangers give us many opportunities to act generously throughout the day.

“I have seen his ways, but I will heal him; I will guide him and restore comfort to him, creating praise on the lips of the mourners in Israel. Peace, peace, to those far and near,” says the Lord.”And I will heal them” (Isaiah 57:18-19).

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:3-7).

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God (Matthew 5:9).

When we read the newspaper, or watch the news, or learn about the scary things happening in our world, like terrorism, war, poverty, job insecurity, suffering, hate crimes, family and community conflict, injustice, and bleak outlooks on life, it’s easy to get discouraged about the lack of peace in our lives and in our world.

You might not be able to stop the terrorists, the genocide taking place in Africa or the poverty in America and nearly every other nation, but there are things you can do to make world better by promoting peace. You can take small steps like standing up for a colleague or class mate that has been unfairly treated, supporting causes that promote human dignity or work to alleviate injustice, learn techniques for conflict resolution, and most importantly, allow the Spirit of Christ to form your inner life such that you become a peace-bearer. Those small steps, if we take them, will carry us towards a more peaceful world.

Communication and dialogue. Communication and dialogue are valuable tools in the peace process. Communication and dialogue enable people with different views to better understand each other. They are also vital to sharing new information and alternative perspectives. Inherent in this suggestion is the need to dialogue with people who think differently from you or who have different skills or experiences. Interfaith and multi-disciplinary dialogue as well as dialogue that includes people from different cultures, age groups, genders, and any other differences that one might be able to think of, has a great deal to offer. Diversity can be a wonderful pathway to holistic understanding. One of the steps my denomination has taken towards dialogue has been to host peace colloquies where people from many different religious traditions can gather to discuss ways to cultivate peace. Many other religious denominations and service organizations have peace-building initiatives that involve communication and dialogue. However, it is also important for us, as individuals, to communicate with others in a way that upholds the worth of whomever we are communicating with, shares our views and knowledge respectfully, and listens to the other person’s views to see what we can learn from what has been shared. Another possible outcome for increased communication and dialogue may be preventing or de-escalating conflict.  Communication and dialogue build relationships and provides opportunities to discover common ground or alternative solutions such as verbally working through disagreements rather than resorting to physical or psychological violence.

Education. Education and training in the research and practice of peace-building is another important step that can be taken in the pursuit of peace. Scholarly research from a variety of fields including peace psychology, sociology, conflict transformation, education, history, religion, economics and political science can all be useful for understanding the multiple contexts of peace and conflict from individual peace of mind to disputes between nations. Understanding conflict and peace have become crucial to making sound decisions that promote peace.

Spiritual Formation. In addition to doing the individual work to cultivate peace, peace-building, and the ability to discern one’s task despite the competing demands for one’s attention and resources, understanding spiritual formation and The purpose of spiritual formation has been to become formed in Christ-likeness. In so doing, an individual takes on those qualities attributed to Christ which include discernment, compassion and peace that goes beyond understanding (Philippians 4:7). Therefore increased opportunities for and emphasis on spiritual formation may go along way towards providing a solid foundation from which peace can grow.
Focusing on individual peace makers. Peace in the world cannot be achieved unless peace resides in and flows from individuals. Peace starts with one and flows to many. Having effective individual agents of peace requires education (such as scholarly research and practice as well as a deepening understanding of Christian tradition and theology) and training in spiritual formation as mentioned above. Additionally, opportunities for dialogue create avenues for the people to share what is working and what still needs improvement. God speaks to each of us and calls us each in a unique way to bear the fruit of peace. It is vital that we each listen to God, discover how we can be agents of peace, and support others in that endeavor.

Other steps.
In addition to the above key steps, there are a variety of steps that you might take to increase you ability to help peace grow. Learning more about reconciliation ministries, conflict transformation and conflict mediation are some examples. You might consider learning to be a facilitator or find people who have expertise in this area to help with the problems you identify in the communities you are involved with. For ideas you might inquire with your church or with other organizations that strive to plant the seeds of peace. You might also consider reading some books by and about those who have been peace advocates.

To cultivate peace in our lives and in the world requires that we are willing to wrestle (and pray), at least for a time, with whatever complications prevent peace from developing. Once that is done, the next steps are taking action, then letting go, and letting God.
Paradoxically the same peace that comes to us in God’s time is the same peace that will not let us rest as long as there is injustice and need. That doesn’t lessen the important strides being made in conflict resolution, diplomacy, working to end poverty in whatever small ways we can, helping the needy, or standing up against injustice, all of those may be actions that are in alignment with Christ.

As Paul says:
“(Because you) belong to Christ Jesus, God will bless you with peace that no one can completely understand. And this peace will control the way you think and feel. Finally, my friends, keep your minds on whatever is true, pure, right, holy, friendly, and proper. Don’t ever stop thinking about what is truly worthwhile and worthy of praise” (Philippians 4:7-8, Contemporary English Version).

 “He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with young”(Isaiah 40:11, KJV).

“How does God’s love abide in anyone who has the world’s goods and sees a brother or sister in need and yet refuses to help? Little children, let us love, not in word or speech, but in truth and action.” (1 John 3:17-18).

“As God’s chosen one, wholly and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion…” (Col. 3:12).

When I was growing up, I loved to hear stories about A.A. Milne’s beloved characters Winnie the Pooh, Christopher Robin, Piglet, Tigger, Owl, Eeyore, and all the rest in the Hundred Acre Wood.

Now that I’ve grown, I still find a lot of wisdom in those tales. One story comes to mind that echoes the above scripture. Pooh Bear is near a river bank and sees Eeyore, his donkey friend, floating by in obvious distress. Pooh asks Eeyore if he has fallen into the river. Eeyore, with pleading eyes, replies that he has indeed fallen in and it was silly of him to do so. Pooh tells Eeyore that he should have been more careful and points out that Eeyore looks like he is drowning. As Eeyore sinks into the water he timidly asks if Pooh would be willing to save him. Pooh calmly rescues him as Eeyore apologizes for being such a trouble. Pooh tells him to think nothing of it, but that Eeyore really ought to have said something earlier. 

This story highlights one of the most important points regarding compassion. Compassion moves us to action. Compassion is hollow in sentiment alone. It must be lived. Compassion comes to fruition in action.

The word compassion, as it is used in the Bible, refers to deeply rooted, visceral feelings. One of the most dramatic biblical terms denoting compassion is splagchna, which literally means the inner organs or bowels. The Hebrews and Greeks came to use the term to refer to deep emotions and profound feelings of affection, tenderness, and our most significant reaction to human need. To be moved with compassion was to be moved from one’s inner organs or gut, like we use the modern expression of feeling something “with my whole heart.” I especially like the connection between guts and compassion. We still use the word gut to indicate a particularly moving and challenging experience. “It was gut-wrenching.” We also use the word to indicate a sensation or awareness, akin to our own personal compass or intuition, such as “my gut feeling is that we should do this.” Yet we also talk about people who act bravely as ‘having guts.” Using these three interpretations points us to an understanding of compassion that: 1) is felt strongly or moves our being, 2) guides our decisions and actions, and 3) calls for courage.

Romans 9:16 tells us that compassion “depends not on human will or exertion, but on God who shows mercy?” The starting point for all compassionate action is not our sympathy, empathy, sensibility, bleeding heart, effort, or our desire for peace or justice. The origination is God’s compassion. The Old Testament states that God’s mercy endures forever (II Chronicles 20:21), and the New Testament testifies that “God so loved the world that he gave His only Son” (John 3:16).

Jesus’ compassion expressed itself through a daily attitude of hospitality. This included both being sensitive to and responsive to the needs of people, and creating a space where they could be, grow, learn, and find nourishment. Hospitality derives from sharing who we are as well as what we have, and allowing others to share and be who they are.

The practice of hospitality testifies of a compassionate God who welcomes us and invites us to share his table, just as in the many fellowship meals record in the gospel and in all of his hospitable acts of compassion. Many of the aforementioned scriptures in this chapter have strong elements of hospitality such as the parables of the sheep in which the Lord comes in the guise of the lowly and the Good Samaritan. Hebrews also advises “Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for thereby some have entertained angels unawares” (13:2. RSV). How have you experienced God as a stranger? How might you like to be able to offer hospitality to God?

One of my favorite images of hospitality comes from the 23^rd psalm:

You prepare a table before me/ In the presence of my enemies./ You anoint my head with oil;/ My cup overflows./ Surely goodness and love will follow me/ All the days of my life,/ And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

In the Judeo-Christian tradition, hospitality was imperative. Being someone’s guest at the table meant that the host assured you of food, fellowship and protection from enemies. To be invited to the Lord’s table was to be assured of food, fellowship and protection forever. How have you experienced Christ’s hospitality?

God extends his hospitality and his welcome to each of us. Cultivating a practice of hospitality means that we seek to remember to welcome and be hospitable to each other and to the Lord as He dwells with us, leads us, and commissions us to serve. God cares about our physical and spiritual needs. We by the grace of God, have the challenge and privilege of comforting and nourishing others, of inviting them to our table, saying, “Come. Receive comfort, healing, nourishment, and protection. You are welcome here.”

Practicing hospitality requires that we extend it to strangers, friends, family, ourselves, and God. My early lessons on hospitality towards strangers always tended towards trying to make friends. I was supposed to be nice to another preschooler so that we could become friends because it was good to make friends. Now, I think that if I am nice only so that I can turn a stranger into a friend, I miss one of the profound lessons of hospitality—the stranger does not need to be a friend. The stranger does not need to change the status of our relationship. Being hospitable to someone I don’t know or don’t know well affirms that I want to treat another person well because God loves both of us. I don’t have to place someone inside my inner circle of friend in order to know our common humanness or to know that we are already connected because of this. In the same fashion, I need not agree with someone in order to be kind, respectful or welcoming.